Science Jokes: Part I

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender replies, "For you, no charge." Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about helium and just couldn't put it down? Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I'm positive!" Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They're cheaper than day rates. What element do women use to get dates? Tellurium What did the chemist say to a chic babe when he passed by her in his sports car? Radon baby! Where does one put the dishes? Zinc What does one do if one can't zwim? Zinc What happens when electrons lose their energy? They get Bohr'ed. What are? What is Ba(Na)2 ? Banana What is NaCl(aq), NaCl(aq), C C C C C C C ? Saline, saline, over the seven Cs What do you do when you find a dead chemist? Barium. What is the purpose of a doctor? Helium. What do you call a convict who dresses up as a clown? Silicon. From way down in my cranium This prediction I will make: That if you eat uranium, You'll get atomic ache.

Quote of the Week:

Housework is a breeze. Cooking is a pleasant diversion. Putting up a retaining wall is a lark. But teaching is like climbing a mountain.

~Fawn M. Brodie-

Quote of the Week:

Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.

~Grace Hansen-

"Fashionably Late to School?"